Poker Odds Calculator TournamentIndicator

Stage 4 inoperable colon cancer prognosis question.?

Hi,
I have been through a few sites in regards to the above subject and I cant seem to get any answers from people. I am extremely anxious and would appreciate some help from anybody with experiences on Stage 4 grade 2 rectal cancer. Dad has just been diagnosed, docs reckons its been there years and the tumor has spread to pelvic tissue with some small nodules around the abdomen and very small ones in stomach, so small the MRI could not detect any other cancer till they opened him up. Other organs are clear too, its just the colon is a mess (as the doctor out it)! Its now inoperable, so aggressive chemo is starting!

But they have confirmed it cant be cured and they said they are treating it like an incurable disease. I am anxious now as is the Chemo he is getting just going to prolong his life rather then get him to remission/Shrink/halt the cancer???. Its all been so sudden, only 8 weeks ago he was flying around fit and healthy for a 59 year old man, all started with a bout of constipation and he deteriorated from there so so fast!

I am worried we may only have months with him as stage 4 in the worst kind. The Chemo is 5FU and oxaliplatin, tablet for one and intrevenus for the other? 2 week cycles, 1 week off between for 9 weeks! and then another MRI.If the treatments are a succuss and shrink tumour Is there a chance of Dad surviving more than a few months or a year with this type of cancer? Please don’t feel you need to sugercoat it for me, I’d rather prepare myself for the worst than have a false hope! y poker face with dad wont reveal any devastating news I may get here.

Even after the initial treatment, if its successful he will get 6 months of the same chemo, could he live longer than just a year or 2??? Could we have more time with him like the 5 year remission??. Thats all I am asking from people who have similar stories. Its my first time dealing with cancer so finding it all very difficult with no one to talk to openly about it, and information would help; good or bad! The US president would be easier to contact that his doctors so this is my only hope of getting answers layman’s terms! Thanks in advance, Lora

Some funny farmer jokes that may land you on your keister laughing? Do you dare read em?

An out-of-towner drove his car into a ditch in a desolated area. Luckily, a local farmer came to help with his big strong horse named Buddy. He hitched Buddy up to the car and yelled, „Pull, Nellie, pull!“

Buddy didn’t move.

Then the farmer hollered, „Pull, Buster, pull!“

Buddy didn’t respond.

Once more the farmer commanded, „Pull, Coco, pull!“

Nothing.

Then the farmer nonchalantly said, „Pull, Buddy, pull!“ And the horse easily dragged the car out of the ditch. The motorist was most appreciative and very curious. He asked the farmer why he called his horse by the wrong name three times.

The farmer said, „Oh, Buddy is blind and if he thought he was the only one pulling, he wouldn’t even try.“

——

Two guys are walking through the woods and come across this big deep hole.

„Wow…that looks deep.“

„Sure does… toss a few pebbles in there and see how deep it is.“

They pick up a few pebbles and throw them in and wait… no noise.

„Jeeez. That is REALLY deep… here.. throw one of these great big rocks down there. Those should make a noise.“

They pick up a couple football-sized rocks and toss them into the hole and wait… and wait. Nothing.

They look at each other in amazement. One gets a determined look on his face and says, „Hey…over here in the weeds, there’s a railroad tie. Help me carry it over here. When we toss THAT sucker in, it’s GOTTA make some noise.“

The two drag the heavy tie over to the hole and heave it in. Not a sound comes from the hole.

Suddenly, out of the nearby woods, a goat appears, running like the wind. It rushes toward the two men, then right past them, running as fast as it’s legs will carry it. Suddenly it leaps in the air and into the hole.

The two men are astonished with what they’ve just seen…

Then, out of the woods comes a farmer who spots the men and ambles over. „Hey… you two guys seen my goat out here?“ „You bet we did! Craziest thing I ever seen. It came running like crazy and just jumped into this hole!“

„Nah“, says the farmer, „That couldn’t have been MY goat. My goat was chained to a railroad tie.“
————-
Doctor jokes
A well respected surgeon was relaxing on his sofa one evening just after arriving home from work. As he was tuning into the evening news, the phone rang. The doctor calmly answered it and heard the familiar voice of a colleague on the other end of the line.

„We need a fourth for poker,“ said the friend.

„I’ll be right over,“ whispered the doctor.

As he was putting on his coat, his wife asked, „Is it serious?“

„Oh yes, quite serious,“ said the doctor gravely. „In fact, three doctors are there already!
———
A young doctor was just setting up his first office when his secretary told him there was a man to see him. The doctor wanted to make a good first impression by having the man think he was successful and very busy. He told his secretary to show the man in.

At that moment, the doctor picked up the telephone and pretended to be having a conversation with a patient. The man waited until the „conversation“ was over. Then, the doctor put the telephone down and asked, „Can I help you?“

To which the man replied, „No, I’m just here to connect your telephone.“
———-
An old man seated in the doctor’s waiting room, when called in to see the doctor, slowly got up, and, grasping his cane and hunching over, slowly made his way into the examining room.

After only a few minutes, the man emerged from the room, walking completely upright! A patient who had watched him hobble into the room all hunched over, stared in amazement.

„That must be a miracle doctor in there!“ he exclaimed. „What treatment did he give you? What’s his secret?“

The old man looked at him and said, „Well, the doctor looked me up and down, analyzed the situation, and gave me a cane that was four inches longer than the one I had been using.“
—————-
Dr. Leroy, the head psychiatrist at the local mental hospital, is examining patients to see if they’re cured and ready to re-enter society.

„So, Mr. Clark,“ the doctor says to one of his patients, „I see by your chart that you’ve been recommended for dismissal. Do you have any idea what you might do once you’re released?“

The patient thinks for a moment, then replies, „Well, I went to school for mechanical engineering. That’s still a good field, good money there. But on the other hand, I thought I might write a book about my experience here in the hospital, what it’s like to be a patient here. People might be interested in reading
ending of last joke. sorry about that.

The patient thinks for a moment, then replies, „Well, I went to school for mechanical engineering. That’s still a good field, good money there. But on the other hand, I thought I might write a book about my experience here in the hospital, what it’s like to be a patient here. People might be interested in reading a book like that. In addition, I thought I might go back to college and study art history, which I’ve grown interested in lately.“

Dr. Leroy nods and says, „Yes, those all sound like intriguing possibilities.“

The patient continues, „And the best part is, in my spare time, I can go on being a teapot.“

I can’t get over ex girlfriend shes moved on and never calls help!?

Its been two months since my girlfriend of 7 months broke up with me. I miss her every day. I am constantly reminded of her throughout each day. When she broke up with me she said she needed time and needed to do this for her. I was crushed. We had an amazing summer together. We were never apart. Three weeks after we broke up she was back with her ex from before me. This news killed me because I was hoping she would come back to me. We never fought and got along great. I just don’t know what went wrong. She told me I was the best looking guy she ever dated too (so i know it wasn’t an attraction thing). I texted her right after the breakup for the first couple weeks. And tried calling her and she never would pick up. When we were together she told me wanted to marry me and we always talked about our future. Well now she broke up with the guy she was with right after us and is on to another random deush. The guy she is dating now used to hound her when we were dating but ignored him since she was with me. I just wish she would wake up and realize how much I love her and come back to me. I miss her she is everything I want in a girl. When i go out now I don’t really care about other girls. Everyone tells me to move on. But its like she is still with me no matter what i do. Like I try not to think about her then i do and look at her facebook then see her with this other guy and it cuts me like a hot poker. And i have to go punch the wall. I am really torn up over her. I moved to the same city as her and now I dont know anyone really and am struggling to find another job. I just don’t know how I could mean nothing to her when I love her and we were so great together. I just don’t know what to do. I wish she would call me or talk to me on facebook or something. I miss her so much i used to talk to her everyday. I know this is long thanks for reading…please help me figure out what to do. thanks

Would you read this? I want your opinion.?

Is there any problem with grammar or wording? This is just one scene of a story I’m writing.

The dueling field was quite large. It covered fifteen acres and was surrounded by a stone wall about ten feet high. Lion-headed fountains were placed at fifty foot intervals. A garden followed the perimeter of the wall and was filled with every type of flower imaginable; Canna, cherry blossom, Colorado columbine, hydrangea, lily of the valley, calla lily, black eyed susan, bleeding heart, blue bell, lantana, rose, oriental poppy, begonia, ixora, dendrobium, red hot poker, sweet william, cockscomb, forget-me-not, and many more. It was a beautiful place, yet it was used to settle disputes between nobility. And this dispute was one worth watching, judging by the crowds. The field was packed with cameras, news crews, royalty, and commoners that had been lucky enough to get a ticket. Even James Washington, Emperor of America, had turned up for the event.
It had started a few months ago when the Duke of Florida, Jose Vargas Florida, and Musca von Georgia, Prince of Georgia, had decided to marry the same woman, Antoinette de Alberta, Princess of Canada. It was easy to see why. The princess was probably the most beautiful creature to ever walk the earth. She had a slim, delicious looking body with a face that was all brown curls and soft green eyes. Many a man would fight for her honor. Hell, I would too if I wasn’t already married.
The Emperor rose from his chair and motioned for the crowd to be quiet. He seemed nervous, but that was understandable. Being fifteen and being the ruler of a country would be tough on anybody, especially if two of the most powerful men in the country were about to try and kill each other. If one of them died, a spot in the government would have to be filled. If they survived, the dispute would continue and nothing would get done in Parliament.
“Lords and Ladies and commoners alike! As of late there has been a dispute between the Duke of Florida and the Prince of Georgia over who will marry the Princess of Canada.” Here the Emperor paused and took a breath. “The two gentlemen have come to the conclusion that a duel would be the only way to solve the dispute. Now as you know . . .”
“Yack yack yack,” I shouted at the TV. I was tired of this formal crap. I wanted to see two guys get shot!
I felt a smack on the back of my head and turned around to find my wife glaring at me.
“Show some respect for the Emperor and the duel! You had to go through the same formalities when you were a judge, as well as when you fought for my hand.”
“And what a mistake that was.”
“What?” my wife replied.
“Nothing dearie. I love you.”
“Don’t pull that dearie stuff with me! And further more . . .”
“Shut it woman! The duel’s starting!”
The two men walked into the middle of the field, each pulling their dueling pistol from a box. Each pistol was exquisitely made. Handles of oak and ash, golden and silver designs encrusted with gems. My dueling pistol was just a bland hunk of pine and brass that didn’t work anymore. I turned the volume up and tried to ignore my wife while she said something about the kitchen sink and cabinets.
The two men squared off, turned, and began walking in opposite directions. I counted the paces with excitement. Just ten more before . . .
Suddenly the Emperor jumped up from his throne and ran to the edge of the dais, screaming something.
“Stop the duel! The Princess Antoinette has arrived with a message for the two men!”
Crappers in milk. I didn’t want to wait any longer.
And so that curvy, well endowed woman walked up to the front of the dais, accompanied by two servants. I sat there with my fingers crossed, hoping that the duel would go on.
“I have not come here to watch this duel, but to prevent it. This duel, whatever the outcome, would be detrimental to both our countries. So I will announce my chosen suitor.”
This was unexpected.
“Our countries have always been enemies, and I have decided to put an end to that.”
She isn’t going to do what I think she is, right?
“I have decided that I will marry James Washington, your Emperor, and unite our countries under one monarchy.”
Silence. Total shock. I sat with my mouth open. The duel I’d been looking forward to for months was done without a single shot fired.
Then I noticed the Duke of Florida and Prince of Georgia. They were talking to each other. Then they nodded, aimed their pistols towards the Emperor, and fired.

My hair is EXTREMELY curly and thick, should I get it permed straight?

It’s like this:
http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?imgurl=http://prettyprettypretty.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/BackBlondeCurlyHairSmall.jpg&imgrefurl=http://prettyprettypretty.com/2009/12/08/in-the-news-the-curly-hair-gene/&usg=__jBdDiG29AP-B5VxCQwXtnzSyjEA=&h=314&w=283&sz=80&hl=en&start=0&sig2=un5GrXTD1JWi5PNygmeZeQ&zoom=1&tbnid=9KvdgaUMrOshzM:&tbnh=153&tbnw=138&ei=ipGwTKrVN4XKswb9qtj_DA&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dcurly%2Bhair%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DN%26rlz%3D1B3GGGL_en-GBGB350GB350%26biw%3D1680%26bih%3D820%26tbs%3Disch:1&um=1&itbs=1&iact=rc&dur=401&oei=ipGwTKrVN4XKswb9qtj_DA&esq=1&page=1&ndsp=40&ved=1t:429,r:32,s:0&tx=92&ty=53 …

Obviously that isn’t me but my hair is like that. It’s also really thick and hard to manage. If I straighten it, not only does it take me FOREVER, but it rarely stays straight. My friend said if i got it permed straight, it would go like this if I ever left it to dry naturally :

http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?imgurl=http://images.beautyriot.com/photos/ashley-olsen-wavy-blonde.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.beautyriot.com/celebrities/ashley-olsen/photo-ashley-olsen-blonde-wavy-hairstyle-pid54&usg=__2u3Stum6obgcbECgcUVopfK3jC8=&h=544&w=400&sz=51&hl=en&start=110&sig2=iHUaRXOwajE7yqAgmoE3yQ&zoom=1&tbnid=P5Q77sFRrBloMM:&tbnh=164&tbnw=121&ei=N5KwTJ3AEcbKjAfb4KiKBQ&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dwavy/straight%2Bhair%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26rlz%3D1B3GGGL_en-GBGB350GB350%26biw%3D1680%26bih%3D820%26tbs%3Disch:10%2C1732&um=1&itbs=1&iact=hc&vpx=419&vpy=451&dur=1139&hovh=262&hovw=192&tx=100&ty=94&oei=BJKwTLfMAszMswbF-IyDDQ&esq=8&page=4&ndsp=37&ved=1t:429,r:2,s:110&biw=1680&bih=820 …

Is she right? Or would it be poker straight?
(Sorry guys, I’m not sure if the links work, if they don’t please could you paste them into your URL bar)